As a mom of 7, 5 of whom are ages six and under, this parenting job is demanding. The hours are long, there is minimal PTO, and the boss or, in my case, bosses are always watching and calling you in for mandatory over-time. Transitioning between "work-mode" and "parent-mode" is now a few steps away versus a drive or bus ride home. We had time to clear our minds, thoughts, and energy before starting our next shift. Now that things have changed and that transition time has decreased, leaving some of us feeling more tense, irritable, and the patience is "gone out the window." Things have changed!!!
Yet the magical moments of parenting still exist. Being able to watch our babies transform into little human beings, what seems to be overnight, is priceless. Bedtime stories become backpack checks; the stumbles from gaining their balance to walk transforms into hours of running and endless energy. The tiny hand wrapped around your finger becomes the hand you hold, providing comfort and confidence as they experience new things in life. The journey of parenting happens fast.
I have gained much insight and wisdom from other mothers throughout my journey. A few things remain consistent: The importance of our physical and emotional health. This sense of wellbeing allows us to stay present and supportive through our little one's meaningful experiences. As our children's first teacher, we must ensure we remain resilient through our trials and tribulations. Here are a few tips to help us stay happy, healthy, and courageous in the face of adversity:
1. Keep hope alive: This is not just a phrase coined by Rev. Jessie Jackson in the late '80s via his speech to the Democratic party. It's a statement that helps to maintain the endurance needed to face adversity. By maintaining a sense of hopefulness, we allow ourselves to explore the options of life. It opens up our mind to the infinite possibilities that the universe has to offer us, versus feeling restricted or trapped in our finite minds. Allow hope to be your first feeling and not your last.
2. Celebrate the milestones: By acknowledging the success, you have accomplished, it increases your confidence. It helps to empower you to feel encouraged to move onto the next step(s).
3. Create space: Create space to breathe. Taking time to focus your breathing not only improves your blood flow, it allows for your body to relax in moments of stress and anxiety. Mindful breathing helps slow down your thoughts to bring awareness and focus to your body's current emotional state. This breathing technique is a great and easy method to use in the spur of the moment.
4. Tag someone in: Reach out for support when needed. Having a support system is essential. Whether that support system is your partner, friend, therapist, or neighbor, knowing when to access their help improves our resiliency. It helps us not to feel overwhelmed with thoughts of hopelessness and self-isolation. You are not alone!
5. Remain present: No more could have, should have, would have. Gone are the days of comparing our current life with our past life. You are where you should be in life, and taking time to "stop and smell the roses" helps decrease moments of depression and anxiety. Engaging in gratitude exercises is a perfect way to "ground" yourself and transform your thoughts, actions, and words to remain present in the moment.
These are a few things you can explore to help experience joy throughout your parenting journey.
Happy parenting!
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